On 10 Aug 2017, at 13:17, we all received an email from Paul Oakden. Here is my take on the letter and its translation into plain English. He wrote:

Counter-intuitively, over the last two months, those of us in the centre have been enjoying an unexpected period of stability.

What’s counter-intuitive about the salariat making sure they’re enjoying a period of certainty even if the party and the members who pay for their salaries have never been more uncertain!

We have an excellent Interim Leader in Steve Crowther …

Isn’t it a bit self-serving for the ventriloquist to praise himself in this way through his sock puppet?

… who, most importantly, is determined to do what is necessary to help UKIP evolve into what it needs to be for the future.

Translated into English: “… is determined to make sure the UKIP mission is irreversibly sabotaged in the way he wants, before the new leader can do anything about it.”

For my part, I marked my one year anniversary as Chairman last week – yes, it came as a surprise to me too.

How come then it came as no surprise to me? I knew this was going to happen when Oakden was made ‘interim’ Party Chairman, supposedly for a period of only six weeks, and swore to the NEC on just about everything except his grandmother’s grave that there was nothing in this world that could persuade him to take the job on a long term basis at the end of this interim period, and that there was no reason for us to be concerned because the NEC expressly refused to make the appointment unless it was on a time-limited basis only. There was no way several of us would have voted to approve it if it had been permanent.

I have been working quietly in the background to try and build a structure and financial platform through which the next Leader can flourish.

Translated into plain English: “I have been working in the background to ensure that by the time there is a new leader, the structure will be such that Crowther and I will control everything regardless and he or she, whomever they may me, won’t be able to do anything about it.”

Working with our excellent Treasurer, John Bickley, our mind-set over the last year has been focused on raising more money than we spend.

That’s not what John Bickley seemed to be advocating when I was on the NEC and pushing for things to be done this way.

I know of no other organisation that would have that level of commitment and dedication to its future from the people it employs, particularly at a time when they’re being given more work to do, not less.

Perhaps that’s because he’s never had a real job. This is not intended as a criticism of some HO staff who are doing a great job but I think we all know people on the UKIP gravy train whose output is seemingly non-existent. Anyone who’s ever worked in a real business, particularly a startup, will see Paul Oakden’s statement as somewhat detached from reality.

One of the things I’m particularly excited about is the excellent work Noel Matthews has been doing on the party restructure. Many of you will have noticed that your Regional Organiser may have given up the role recently and that the party has taken no steps to replace them. The simple reason is that we want to change the way in which these roles are appointed and make the process more transparent, open and crucially more available to the membership.

Translated into plain English: “The simple reason is that we want to appoint our people to all the key positions so that Crowther and I still control the party regardless of who is the new Leader.”

These are the roles whose primary focus is to represent the party to the members, while your elected structure is, of course, the reverse.

Or, in English: “These are the roles with which Crowther and I control the party, while your elected structure is, of course, just for decoration.”

On the newly appointed General Secretary Paul Oakley:

Paul [Oakley] is an incredibly impressive, diligent and committed NEC member, with a legal background that makes him the perfect choice for the role. He stood for the NEC on a platform of transparency and openness and he is already working hard alongside colleagues to deliver that to our members.

I have known Paul for some time and always thought him to be a good chap. But presumably the platform of transparency and openness is the reason why the NEC removed the Clacton PPC Jeff Bray, chosen by the branch, and appointed Paul Oakley, who just happened to be an NEC member, to be the PPC in that constituency?

A huge amount of blood, sweat and tears went into winning our referendum last year.

Just not the blood, sweat and tears of our Aston Martin driving pilot!

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